Maybe this is all a dream
by MollyBelikova
Summary: His Roza gets taken away too soon. Dimitri's thoughts and life after. CONTAINS CHARACTER DEATH.


Maybe this is all a dream.

_Hi guys, this is a one-shot that I've had in my head for quite a while and am finally giving in and writing it lol, hope you all enjoy. I was listening to Off I Go by Greg Laswell when I wrote it._

'Rose, behind you' I screamed, but it was too late. Too late for her to react and too late for me to help. The Strigoi reached his hands and snapped her neck with little effort and moved on to the next one. She fell to the floor in what seemed like slow-motion to me, her body lifeless and loose hair framing her face. Her eyes were still open. Felt a sharp pain in my chest and looked round expecting a Strigoi to be attacking me, but there were none near me, honestly, I would have welcomed it without a fight. There was no way I could live without my Roza.

Maybe this is all a dream, I thought to myself, but no. She really was gone. The battle had started when a group of Strigoi had gotten too close to court, and after the historical St. Vlads attack, no-one took any chances anymore. Things had changed a lot in the past 10 years, Roza and I had married in a quiet ceremony in Russia, Lissa had married Christian and had 3 children, with another on the way, and Moroi were beginning to learn to fight and go out to battle if they wanted. There were some here at the battle today. Roza and I had been due to retire next year, we were going to start a family, but now that would never happen. Roza had so wanted to be a mother but she had realised it could never be possible whilst we still worked in the field. Now she would never get to hold her child in her arms.

I walked towards her body. It felt like my legs were in thick mud, and the rest of my body was on auto-pilot. I fell down to the floor where she was and cradled her lifeless body against mine, tears running down my face. The battle was coming to an end around us, the last remaining Strigoi being picked off, but I didn't notice, or care. All I cared about was her. And now she was gone.

I closed my eyes and breathed in the scent of her hair

'_Hey comrade, what happened to that new shampoo I bought?' she asked, stepping out of the bathroom in our house, in only a towel.  
'I don't know Roza, it might have disappeared, never to be seen again' I smirked. I had removed it when she wasn't looking, it just didn't smell like her, and the one she normally used, did crazy things to me. I walked up to her, and took the towel off her head, releasing the long dark locks I loved so much. 'Much better' I whispered, taking in the scent. I ran my hands down her shoulders whilst we locked eyes. I ran my fingers around the top of her towel, and quickly pulled that off too. She gave a quick intake of breath. I picked her up and threw her on our bed. 'You're going to need another shower Roza' I said, as I started down at her hungrily._

There were so many moments like that. They were perfect. They would never happen again. Never would she call me comrade again. Never would she tease me. She was the one that grounded me. Now what would I do.

I became conscious of someone putting their hand on my shoulder and I opened my eyes. It was Alberta. She had transferred here to do a desk job last year, having refused to retire, but being deemed too old for field work. She had only been allowed to come today because they thought it would be easy. Never did I think this was the day I would lose her. The tears were uncontrollable at this point, huge sobs racking my body. I could see the pain in Alberta's face. I didn't want to live anymore.

It was the day of her funeral today. I dressed in a black suit, leaving my hair down as that was her favourite. I had a small rose to wear on my chest. I took a deep breath, readying myself for the hours to come. All I had to do was keep it together then. Just survive. The coffin was black with red roses painted up the sides. It was exquisite, but not as beautiful as the girl inside. I felt the tears ready to fall, but closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I would get through this, even if it killed me. Hopefully it would.

The service was beautiful too, not that I paid any attention. Lissa spoke, and I was asked to but refused, unable to control myself if I did. I hoped she wouldn't mind. Her parents came over and hugged me afterwards, and so did many other people that I didn't notice. When people started to leave, I went to sit at the front of the church, next to Lissa. We sat in silence as she held my hand. She understood the pain I was in. 'I can't' I whispered, more to Roza that Lissa.  
She looked at me. 'Just survive Dimitri. That's all you can do at the moment, and she would have wanted you to live your life'. I hung my head. She was right. I honestly didn't know how I would get through this.

This was it. The moment I would get to see my Roza again. It had been 2 painful years since we lost her. I was defending Christian, but I knew he would be ok. He had the royal guard with him. I had never been the fighter I had been when Roza was alive. I had died with her, except now I really would. The Strigoi came towards me and I knew he had me. I put my arms to my side, and closed my eyes. I had a small smile on my face. It came quicker than I thought it would. When I opened them again, she was there, standing next to me, holding her arms out. I ran into her embrace and I got my world back. The smell of her hair was still how I remembered it would be. I rested my hand on her cheek. 'I've missed you Roza'

I hope you're all not too depressed lol, its just been going around in my head forever! Let me know what you think pleaseeee

Molly


End file.
